Just when I thought it was safe ...

Typically when I get through the chemo haze then I'm good to go for another couple weeks until the next Chemo Cocktail hour.  Well, there is nothing like a little false sense of security to humble oneself!  Last night after I got home from work I felt a bit "itchy" but didnt' think too much about it.  I had a big day ahead of me and wanted to get a good nights sleep so took some antihistamine and went off to bed. 

I woke up very early to find myself COVERED head to toe with a rash that was not only unsightly (like chicken pox on steroids) but also VERY itchy.  Great.  So I quickly readjusted my schedule (a special thank you to Peter for responding to me in the early hours of the morning with a "I have your back" lifeline email) for the day and waited for the stroke of 7am to come to contact the Oncology Nurse (Marisa hadn't even had a sip of her coffee yet poor thing!). 

Her instructions, after a couple questions, were to take some Dexmethsone and she would call me back once she had reached the Oncologist.  She rang back shortly thereafter with the confirming instructions to "take Dexmethsone for the next couple days and a antihistamine and ride the storm out"....hmmm, basically it was a "suck it up Princess" moment for me.  So I asked her if this would give me instant relief....I could hear her smile across the phone.  The answer was a "no" and a reconfirming, "suck it up and you'll be ok" (of course she didn't say that but that was how I played it back in my head and to my husband Tony). 

Okay...a lot of self talk as I sat in the car getting ready to head to what I thought several minutes earlier was going to be to the doctors office or even perhaps hospital (but had no fever so thought that was low risk... even though I packed just in case) ....So I slowly got back out of the car and decided to work from home and keep the skin cool for the day. 

Thanks for all those who have been patient and resilient with this change to my day!  (I did get a phone call late in the day from one my team leaders who said, "man have you been on fire today...the office here is hopping as you have turned up the fire!"....who me?). 

Resilience is accepting your new reality, even if it's less good than the one you had before.

Elizabeth Edwards